First Half Favorites for 2016

My friend Lesa posted her First Half Favorites for 2016 at her blog - https://lesasbookcritiques.blogspot.com/.

Nor surprisingly, we share a few faves.


I don't always do a favorites list at the end of the year any more, but I do post the list of what I've read during the year.  And I will highlight a few that have stayed with me.

But this half year list intrigues me.


When I thanked Lesa for coming up with such a clever idea, she told me it was actually Jen Forbus's idea of a couple years ago.  And that doesn't surprise me a bit.  Jen keeps her blog - http://www.jensbookthoughts.com/ - fresh with a wealth of continuous new ideas.


So, I'm going to hop on this bandwagon and tell you my favorites of the year - so far.


"The Never-Open Desert Diner" by James Anderson


"My Southern Journey" by Rick Bragg


"The View From the Cheap Seats" by Neil Gaiman.  (Actually, I haven't finished this on yet.  I'm plucking essays out slowly and savoring them.  Which is exactly what I did with Rick Bragg's "My Southern Journey."  They're both delicious books and I can't say enough about them).


"Night Shift" by Charlaine Harris


"Wilde Lake" by Laura Lippman

"A Great Reckoning" by Louise Penny (I read an ARC - official publication is not until August, but worth the wait!)

Reflections

Like all years, this has been one of ups and downs.


Unlike most years, the ups and downs have hit higher and lower than usual.


It's been a year that I've spent more time reflecting on things.

I've spent more time making personal decisions about what I want out of life, what I want to do with my time left here in this world.


Laura Lippman, who does a lot of amazing things, writes a one word resolution column that I look forward to.  You can read this year's at her blog, The Memory Project.  http://www.journalscape.com/LauraLippman/2015-12-28-16:13/


It's hard to come up with just one word.  

It's especially hard if you're a wordy kinda person who has never in her life been able to share a single thing in, as my friend Michael Dean would always beg, "Oh, Dear God - the abbreviated version, please!"


But I did.  



But.  


Well.


Actually.


I admit it - I couldn't really just do one.

So I came up with two.


One is "do."

The other is "stretch."


Here's a confession.

I have not shared this with many people 'cause it's just silly.

And, it seems, I think - so unlike me.

I like to think of myself as an independent sort.

And I guess I am.

But it's only been up to a point.

It has not, for many years, included getting in a car and just driving myself some place.  

Not, of course, including around Boone, or areas fairly close.

But whenever I've wanted to go anywhere more than a couple hours away, Donald Scott Barley has always, always, said "sure, I'll take you."

And I had grown to count on that.

And it's lovely having a partner who will do that, and he's fun as all hell to travel with so I really hadn't given it a lot of thought.

Didn't even realize how I had caused my own world to shrink.

My Bouchercon friends had no idea that driving myself to Raleigh was as big a deal as it was.  Most of them had no idea that getting myself there was a very big deal to me.

And, after doing it, it was not the big deal I had been concerned about either.


I just did it.


With the help of Samantha.  

Samantha is our GPS lady.

And although she gets a little grumpy and will start berating me to "Make a U-Turn."  and to make it as soon as possible, she and I travel well together.

As a matter of fact, she's part of my "Do." 

In 2016 I intend to hop into my car and ask Miss Samantha to help me find my way to visit family in Knoxville.  A girlfriend in Nashville.  Hell's Bells, who knows what's next?  Watch out friends, I may just show up on your doorstep, knock on the door and demand a cup of coffee!


I know.


Silly, right?


But at least I'm getting myself outside of my little self-made borders of constriction.

And that's not all.

I've made some additional plans to "do."

I'm not going to sit at my computer and just bitch about the political situation here in North Carolina that makes me sad and angry and frustrated.

Nope.

I'm going to be working to help Sue Counts in her bid for the House against Jonathan Jordan.

I have NO idea what I'll be doing, but something.

Whatever Sue thinks I can do to help.  It's past time for me to be out there actually doing something.


What else?

I'm not sure, but this is my year to DO.


For awhile I was working with our literacy association.  I stopped doing that because I was working with an individual in attempts to improve reading and comprehension skills.  A person I grew to respect and care about.  A person who had a story that broke my heart.  It's not my story to tell, so I won't.  But, I learned more from the association than he did.  I have a problem with being able to remove my heart from situations that have caused people pain.  And from this experience I have learned that my skill sets do not include one-on-one assistance, but more in the way of administrative assistance.  Spending my entire working life as a secretary can be put back to use in my retirement in a way that I'll find fulfilling, I think.



My second one word resolution is "stretch."  


I hope to stretch myself creatively.  

My publishing, up until this past year, included personal memoir essays, my novel, and helping Harley write his book.

This year I had two short stories published, so my "stretch" has already begun.

We're going to continue that stretch in the year 2016 and see just how far we can take it.

It'll be a fun thing.


And tonight I'm going to sit myself down and do something that has become a part of my year-end routine.

I'm going to read this amazing book by Neil Gaiman.

Have you read it?

Do it.

You'll thank me.

And I wish you all a 2016 of good things.

Do the things you've been putting off, maybe.  

Or do more of the things you love doing.

I'll be thinking about you while Samantha helps me get out and discover a whole bunch of new places and things.

Women - The Lovely and The Horrid

an earlier version originally posted at Jungle Red 3/1/2015


All in all, I think I'm a pretty positive person.

I'm pretty happy with my life, most times. We all, of course, have those times that are trying, or sad, or just damned hard. We all handle those times differently, as we should. We own them and they're ours to do with what we can.

But. If you know me, you also know I get angry and tend to speak my mind about the things that I see as injustices. This piece was prompted by an email I received from a young woman I've gotten to know through the internet. She read "Whimsey," sent me a very nice email about how much she enjoyed it, and we've exchanged the occasional note over the past couple of years. I'm going to call her Jane.

Jane confided in me that she had been writing since she was quite young and was working on a manuscript. She asked if there were books about writing that I would recommend, and it's just been that sort of on-line relationship - not "friends," but "friendly." And I like her.

But a couple weeks ago I received a note from her that broke my heart.

Jane had shared some of her writing with a close friend who proceeded to ridicule her efforts, and then told her she was delusional if she thought she was ever going to be an author.

Jane was crushed, of course. Hurt, of course. And her self-confidence shattered.

When she told me about this incident, she asked if I had ever had something similar happen and you know, I had to admit that yes, I had.

Without going into all that, when Jane asked me what would I do, my advice was to keep writing, of course. And to write about this. This heartbreak - write about the hurt. Write it out. And I sent her a copy of Neil Gaiman's "Make Good Art Speech" book.

I did not tell her we should perhaps look into hiring a hitman.











In the meantime, I have fretted about Jane and the fact that she's had her heart broken by a "friend." And, I knew I had to write it out, just like I had advised her to do. This is the sort of thing that breaks my heart and makes me crazy. What is with someone who is capable of hurting someone this way?

So, I vent. I vent by writing. It's the way I've vented since forever. I know you know exactly what I mean, and I'm betting most of you do the same thing. Write it out. Getting the bad things out by letting the feelings flow onto paper. It is amazingly cathartic. And not at all surprising that therapists will encourage their patients to do this very thing.



And in case you haven't figured it out yet, there's a rant coming as I write it out.



During her keynote speech at the "Celebrating Inspiration" luncheon with the WNBA's All-Decade Team in 2006, Madeleine Albright said:

“There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women."

It struck a chord with women.

It certainly struck a chord with this woman.

It's a sentiment I try to live. Something I believe in. Something I love, admire and respect in other women who also embrace this attitude in their life's creed.



However.


Being the pragmatic, mouthy, prickly, outspoken soul that I am, I also believe the statement contains an unspoken caveat.



And that is this - not all women deserve our help.



I'm sorry if this offends some of you, truly, I am.

But here's a fact as I know it.

Mean girls we knew growing up, oftentimes have grown up to be mean women.

Mean, competitive in a not so nice way, manipulative, and the scariest thing of all, is when they're capable of hiding these things behind a kind exterior with charm and phony grace wrapped firmly around their own agenda.

You know them. Or, if you don't, God has blessed you because you are one lucky, lucky soul.

Women who just don't "get" the importance of women friends. They might profess their support, only to slyly undermine your efforts behind your back. This is, of course, rooted in insecurities so deep that it's sad, really. And to be pitied, I suppose. I revel in the fact that because mean sly souls aren't as smart as they give themselves credit for and because true nature will always show itself, they're eventually found out.




I know, I know. I sound cranky, paranoid and pretty insecure myself.

Having been burned, however, my radar is now extremely accurately and finely tuned. NASA's engineers and scientists have nothing on me when it comes to this well tuned radar of mine, I promise. Because I have been burned, and because I know others have, people I care about, here's a promise I've made to myself -






To the Polyanna self that resides in my soul.

I will cast aside the mean girls who grew into mean women.

I will rejoice in the women who are strong enough to support other women who are deserving. I am thankful every single day that I have always had more of these in my life than the other.

I will remember that these women are a blessing to be celebrated. Their numbers are many, may they multiply. May they teach us, so that we may in turn teach others. May we embrace one another's differences and praise one another's talents in their uniqueness.

And let me, please, remember who they are - the good and the bad - so that I may praise the good, be one of their number, speak out on their behalf, and speak out against those who are not.

And help me, please, be one of those who will continue doing what she can to support and help those who need it and deserve it.

First Sunday of the Month

And today's my day to play at Jungle Red as "Oh, Kaye!"  http://www.jungleredwriters.com/

I hope you'll stop by to say "Hey!" as I share some of Neil Gaiman's magical words.

Words to Live By - by Neil Gaiman

I'm not sure, but I would have to guess that this is one of the most shared quotes of our age.

It is, for sure, one of the loveliest.

From Neil Gaiman

"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself."

May we all remember these words - and try our ever lovin' best to live by them.

and keep the magic in our lives as long as we can.

source:  http://www.flickr.com/photos/dominic_kamp/3495695552/

My Newest Most Favorite Quote Ever (at least for now)

I love quotes.

I ran across this one at Facebook yesterday.  J.D. Rhoades had posted it, and I promptly "borrowed" it and posted it on my Facebook page.

"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself." - - - Neil Gaiman

It touched my soul.

I've heard of Neil Gaiman, but I've never read any of his work.  That, I do believe, is going to change.  I believe Mr. Gaiman's work is referred to as "Urban Fantasy."  This doesn't sound like the type of writing that might appeal to me - but, as you know, I've been wrong before.  I'm going to give it a try - any of you have a suggestion as to which of his books I should start with?

And while we're talking about quotes, I'm thinking this would make a fun blog.   Do you have some favorites you'd care to share?

And finally - some of you have gently reminded me that I forgot to post Christmas pictures of Harley!  WHAT was I thinking?!  Here's a couple.  Enjoy!