Sunday, November 15, 2015


I'm a fairly solitary soul.

Always have been, even as a little girl.  I'm thinking maybe being an only child was the beginning of my becoming an introvert, but also being a person of great imagination.

The imagination can be a magical and wondrous thing, but it's also the source of being able to think up the wildest things to fret about.


I can close my eyes at night and imagine the most dire of events playing out.

Most of them, thank God, are entirely too far fetched to ever come to fruition.

But not all.


Not all.

Going through a time of sadness brings with it a time of reflection.

The past few months have had me doing a lot of that.

It's also brought front and center how very much I'm missing girl friends.

Yesterday my friend Jill and I went to the Boone Annual Seconds Sale.  It's an event that's been going on for years and years and years. An event where many people arrive a couple hours ahead of time before the doors open with their chairs and their coffee.  And just spend some visiting with others who have waited an entire year to spend their hard earned money on pottery and other other pretties made by local artisans.

It started out being a sale of pottery seconds at a much reduced price from the gallery prices the artisans' work sold for.

Over time it's changed and evolved to include weaving, hand painted silk, stained glass, jewelry, photography, paintings - any number of wonderful things.  Not necessarily seconds, but still at great prices.

It's a fun event.  Not only do we get to spend our money, but it's a social thing also.  I see people at the Seconds Sale I rarely see otherwise.  Get to catch up, grab some hugs.   And make promises to get together before another whole year has passed.

With my heart on my sleeve these days, I am so easily moved to tears it's embarrassing.

I've always been easily moved to tears.  Anyone who knows me, knows this about me.

But lately?  whew, boy.  I'm a mess.

(as I pick up a tissue).

Jill and I had a good time.  We shopped.  We giggled.  We talked.  And because we've both suffered losses recently, yes, there were a few tears.

During this time of giving thanks, I am thankful for Jill.  More thankful than she'll ever know.

But man, I am missing me some of my gal pals that don't live close.

Some of them I've known since I was a kid.

Some I met while we were partying hard on the streets of Atlanta.

Some I've met through work.

Some I've met on-line, many from the mystery community.

So this is for my girlfriends.

I love you guys.

Thanks for being my friend.

(note - I have not attributed an author name to the piece below because I find conflicting information when I search.  If anyone knows the name - for sure - let me know, please)

Get yourself some girlfriends....You are gonna need em

Many years ago when I was first married, I was 
relaxing under a magnolia tree on a humid Louisiana summer day, drinking iced tea and getting to know my new sister-in-law, Estelle. I had moved to my husband's hometown and she was the only family member close to my age. Not much older than me, but already the mother of three, Estelle seemed to me experienced and wise. Her face suddenly took on a very serious expression and in the most charming of Southern drawls she said to me,"Get yourself some girlfriends," clinking the ice cubes in her glass. "You're gonna need girlfriends to go places with and do things with." 
What a funny piece of advice, I thought. Hadn't I just gotten married? Hadn't I just joined the "couple-world?" I was a married woman, for goodness sake! Not a young girl who needed girlfriends anymore. I had girlfriends when I was 
living at home and in high school! 

But I listened to this new sister-in-law and I got myself some girlfriends. As the years tumbled by, one after another, gradually I came to understand that Estelle knew what she was talking about. And I remembered that she had said the word "girlfriends" with a lot of emphasis. And year after year I discovered the subtle difference between friends and girlfriends. 
You go to work with friends, go to dinner with friends, go to church with friends, belong to clubs with friends. You send friends greeting cards. You need friends in your life. After all, all girlfriends were once only friends. And all Southern women have friends and they also have girlfriends. But a girlfriend is different. 

First of all, a girlfriend is NOT "just like a sister." 
Sisters have a distinct bond, sometimes good, sometimes bad. Sisters flow from family love and attachments. Girlfriends choose each other. Over the years girlfriends have blessed my life. And here is what I have learned about them: 

Girlfriends don't compete. 

Girlfriends will bring casseroles and also scrub your bathroom or all floors when you are sick. 

Girlfriends will keep your children, and they will keep your secrets. 

Girlfriends give advice when you ask for it. 
Sometimes you take it, sometimes you don't. 
And it makes no difference..either way. 

Girlfriends don't always tell you that you are right. 

Girlfriends might send you a birthday card, but they might not. And if they don't it does not matter in the least. 

Girlfriends laugh with you and you sometimes need absolutely nothing to start the laughter. 

Girlfriends don't talk about you behind your back. 

Girlfriends help you out of jams, the dumps, and the blues. 

Girlfriends don't keep a calendar that lets them know whose turn it is to do what. 

Girlfriends will give a party for your son or daughter when they get married or have a baby in whichever order that comes! 

And girlfriends are there for you in an instant, and truly... when the hard times come. 

Girlfriends listen when you lose a job, a husband, or anyone dear to you. 

Girlfriends will listen when your children break your heart, and will hold you when you cry. 

Girlfriends will listen when your parents' minds and bodies fail, and cry with you. 

When girlfriends are young, they have no idea of the incredible joys or the incredible sorrows that lay ahead of them. Nor do they know how much they will need each other. 
Young women today should take my sister-in-law's advice. "Get yourself some girlfriends." 
You're gonna need them. 

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